This is my first finished Suzi Blu Angel.
Throughout the process of working on this piece, I was frustrated and dissatisfied. I would work on it, step back to look, and: ugh! What does it need? I had no idea. I was confused: why does it look like crap?! Why can't I bring it all together? Because it's not done.
Steve said something interesting when I was showing him the finished Angel and attempting to explain this. He asked me, "Is it because you moved around so much? Nothing was permanent, so you have this impatience like your Dad did to just get it done NOW?"
And I thought about that: like, yeah, that is it, isn't it?
I realized I've always been like that with my art. Impatient. Wanting to be done quickly. Wanting to create great things NOW. Wanting to make a perfect piece the first try.
Look at the Angel in an early stage. She already has several layers here, of graphite, colored pencil, and paint. And she looks blah. She's still a sketch.
Now look at a later stage next to the finished piece. The finished Angel has more depth and modeling in her features, and so much surface texture.
And that is what I've been missing - MORE. So much destroyed and discarded artwork that I never gave a chance because I gave up, not realizing that all it needed was more. More layering, more materials, more attention, MORE.
I get it now. I get it.